The Story of Joshua (part two)

When Joshua came back to me that spring, it quickly became apparent that his reading and writing skills had regressed tremendously. It was almost as if he hadn't gone to school the entire time he was away. If he were to be passed on to first grade he would surely struggle. My advice, hold him back.

I spoke to his great grandmother about my concerns, who then spoke to his father. After a brief conversation with his father on the phone, having heard the words directly from me, he agreed knowing I would always have Joshua's best interest at heart.

A day later my principal asked if I would be willing to have Joshua in my class again the following year. The only way his father would hold him back was if he was placed with me. Again, of course. My principal stated that he knew the question was only a formality!

The school year ended with our final Brown Bag It where family members come in to have lunch with the kids and we put on a little show for them. Joshua's great grandmother and my mother were both in attendance. Joshua asked if he could take a picture with my mom and me. Once again, of course.



The following year I couldn't wait to start teaching! I was so excited about having Joshua again. I knew with the foundation he now had I could really take him far! He came in so eager to learn! Eager to be with me! He was in my top reading group almost from the get go!

Once again we were sharing snacks, giving hugs, saying, "I love you" and having the best year ever.

Thanksgiving was upon us and I took a few days off before the holiday to visit friends up in Michigan. While there I received an email that sank my heart and left me in tears.

It was from Joshua's great grandmother. Joshua's mother showed up in the school the day before Thanksgiving vacation was to begin. She claimed there was a death in the family and needed to take the children. Everyone knew she was lying. The school stalled as long as they could but the family could not be reached by phone, the necessary paperwork was not in his file and with no other choice the school had to turn the children over to their mother.

Once again, I didn't get to say, "good-bye"......worse, I was wracked with guilt for not being there the day she came to the school. Maybe it's best I wasn't because for sure, they'd be arresting me for not turning over the boy.

I couldn't get back to Pennsylvania fast enough. The first moment back I spoke with my principal. Our school had been notified that she was going to be enrolling them into a new school. She was angry that Joshua had been held back and was pushing to have him enrolled into first grade. Upon testing him, the new school refused and placed him in kindergarten.

My principal was going to call and speak with the new principal about what the real deal was with the mother, but she had gotten to the new principal before he was able. She gave the new principal a sob story and asked if the father would be able to come sign out the children like she had. They advised her and explained how to get a PFA against the dad!!!!

She lied to the judge telling him that Joshua wakes with nightmares about how his father had beat him and how he begs to not have to go with him. The judge granted a six month PFA. The father was only allowed supervised visits for two hours, every other week. He didn't even get that much. The mom didn't want Joshua around his great grandmother so she refused to bring him for visitation. His dad got to see him once around Christmas and again in February.

The PFA was not to end until the middle of June, so I knew any hope of getting my Joshua back was pointless.

Periodically I would get emails from his great grandmother asking me to pray for Joshua and his father. She told me that when she got to see him around Christmas she took photos along. Included was the picture of Joshua, my mother and me. She told me it was the first picture he asked if he could keep.


In early June I received another email from his great grandmother. They hadn't been able to see The kids since February, but the mom's girlfriend wanted the children to be able to visit and was willing to drive them down. They would be seeing them on Saturday. I asked her to please give him a hug from me and tell him that I love him. She asked if I wanted to stop over to see him and give him the hug myself.....of course!

She told me she was not going to tell Joshua and let it be a surprise...

I asked if it was alright with his father. I knew his dad was still very angry with the school for having turned him over. He did not understand, or want to accept, that legally they had too. She assured me it was fine.

Saturday came. The sun was shinijng hot and bright. I could hardly wait.

I drove my white pickup truck and parked near the barn about 20 yards from the farm house, Joshua and his sister were running around the yard. I could see his great grandmother walking across the meadow on the other side of the street coming towards the house.

When Joshua saw the pickup he came to a stop. He didn't recognize the truck. He kept looking and looking trying to identify who had arrived. I wasn't sure how he would react or feel about seeing me....it had been seven months.

I needn't have worried....The moment he realized it was me he shot off into a full out sprint headed in my direction. I knew better than to take another step and just braced myself. Joshua leapt into my arms with a full on smack!!!! His little arms and legs wrapped so tightly around me that there was scarcely room for air between us. Tears filled my eyes.

I carried him the twenty yards to the house. His great grandmother hugged "us" and said that she had seen him run. Joshua would not let go. After five minutes or more his great grandmother directed me to a bench where I could sit whilst still holding him.

As I sat there I noticed a heavy set boy around the age of twelve, buzz cut hair with tattoos all over his neck and wondered why on earth a parent would allow the boy to get tattoos at such a young age and such an obvious location. Turns out that was mom's new girlfriend.

Joshua finally climbed down off of me and wanted to show me everything! The chickens, his bed room, the garden, his bow......the down stairs. Unfortunately, that's where dad was apparently hiding out or sleeping and he did not want to be disturbed. Unaware that I was with Joshua he yelled at him to get outside.

I can understand his anger. I don't know any man that wouldn't be angry when his wife leaves him for another woman and basically kidnaps the children and issues a PFA against him. I think I'd have trouble being around the new girlfriend too.

Anyway, Joshua and I went back outside and sat on the bench. The girlfriend had finally walked away a bit and I had some time alone with Joshua. I pulled out a rock from my pocket. A piece of tiger's eye. The sun caught it and it glittered and sparkled as if it were pure gold. I handed it to Joshua who just sat mesmerized with it, rolling it in his fingers.

I told him that tiger's eye is a protective stone and brings out inner strength and that I wanted him to have it and hold on to it so that when ever he saw it he would know that I truly love him and want him safe and that I think about him all the time!

With that the girlfriend started to walk towards us and what happened as a result so took me aback that chills went down my spine and the hairs stood up on the back of my neck.... Joshua heard her too and instantly shoved the rock into his pocket and said he was going to put it in there to keep it safe. The only way to discribe it was as if it were a knee jerk reaction, as if someone who has been hit repeatedly will automatically raise their arm to block the shot if someone else arbitrarily raises a hand around them. It disturbed me greatly. He was obviously afraid that it would be taken from him.

Once safely tucked into his pocket, Joshua asked me if I wanted to see the creek.....of course! I hadn't planned on tramping around the woods and creek with a six year old...but hey, I was game!

We got down to the water's edge where he started to skip rocks and play in the water. I just watched....pure joy. He started to play around with some more rocks in the water...washing dirt from them....examining them.... A bird whistled and took my attention away for a moment. When I looked back Joshua's little hand was outreached, wrapped around a newly washed rock. He said, "this is for you." my eyes swelled and silent tears caressed my cheeks. I accepted it in silence. He then held out another newly washed rock...this one a flat skipping rock and said, "you can have this one too, if you want it.". I answered, "of course I want it, they're beautiful."

Not only beautiful, but more precious than any diamond I've every owned....

We made our way back to the house by way of rock hopping down the creek and climbing through high grasses on the bank. There we once again sat on the bench visiting,chatting within view of the girlfriend.

Joshua's father came out. Everything became instantly uncomfortable. I did not know where the great grandmother was located. Apparently, I learned later that she was in the house cleaning strawberries for Joshua and I to share.

Not wanting to over stay my welcome, I told Joshua it was time for him to walk me to my truck that I needed to go. Reluctantly he stood up and took my hand.

When we got to the truck I asked him for a hug good-bye, but it was too late. His beautiful blue eyes had glassed over. He was shutting down his heart. I picked up and hugged his limp body for all it was worth. I whispered in his ear over and over again that I loved him.....but he was gone.

I got in my truck, pulled out the drive and cried all the way home.


(to be continued.....)